Jimmer
As told by his Mother
W
e call him Jimmer because that's what he's decided he wants to be called. His name is James Bilderback, and he's spent most of his 45 years as "Jimmy" to distinguish him from his dad, Jim.
We didn't know we had a problem with Jimmer when he was born. He was always slow to achieve the levels of early childhood such as sitting up, walking, and talking. He just barely made each in the accepted time frame except for talking, and this lack is what sent us looking for help. At 9 years, he went off to school in Wichita, KS; following several years there, he was next enrolled in The Woods School in Langhorne, PA. At age 21, it was time to find a place for him to work and, with hope, a residence where he could live and interact with his peers. We lived in Essex, CT at that time, and a caseworker from the state told us "the best place for your son is in Bethel at Ability Beyond Disability (formerly DATAHR." Jim's dad was able to return to Union Carbide Corp. and we were off to the Danbury area to live.
When Jim first arrived at Ability Beyond Disability there was some concern that he would be unable to work at a level provided in the workshop on Miry Brook Road. That seems so strange now since he's grown beyond the workshop to community employment and today happily works on an evening crew at Cendant.
We were fortunate to secure a place for Jimmer in a group home several years after he started at Ability Beyond Disability. Again, he's progressed beyond our hopes and for several years has been part of the SIL (Supported Independent Living) program. He interacts well with his apartment-mate, Chuck, and is devoted to staff members, especially Rose.
Jimmer's success story is also a family success story. When we planned to retire to Virginia, where we could be in a warmer climate and approximately half-way between Jimmer and our other son and his family in South Carolina, we were naturally concerned with the effect this would have on him. We decided to go ahead, however, confident that he was in the best program for him that was available anywhere, and one that had grown to the place where we could feel secure that Jimmer would be as "set" for his lifetime as it is possible to be. We have a personal 800 number that Jim can use to call us about once a week, or more if he wishes, and he makes holiday trips to our home and we visit him in Danbury. The Danbury area is his home, and he considers it such. The community and Ability Beyond Disability have given us all a sense of peace that we've decided well and Jimmer will be imaginatively and lovingly cared for the rest of his days.
